I have to say that the fact that man purchase porn and sex dolls while women are purchasing vibrators has nothing to do with proving your point.

Porn and sex dolls are mostly objectifying women. Most porn, and most sex dolls, do not require any connection at all: they are merely objects.

And most women need a vibrator because of that orgasm gap you mention later: they simply do not know how to please themselves “like men do”.

We have been brought up in a society that thinks that sex is penetration which ends when a man ejaculates. And women are expected to orgasm during that intercourse or shortly thereafter.

When women have sex with another women, or have solo sex, this pressure of orgasming around the man’s rhythm is reduced to null and that’s why the orgasm gap is almost gone.

At the end, I completely agree with you that man look for connection through sex. But the reasoning that you mention is flawed and I find myself feeling angry as I think many women who read your article might think that something is wrong with them because they can’t enjoy a connection through sex. And also men might think that the sex you see porn is how you connect with women.

So many women need to understand that pretty much everything — everything! — they absorbed about sex and sexuality is simply wrong. And there’s nothing wrong with them for not being able to orgasm or feel pleasure during sex.

And men need to learn that porn is the worst place to learn how to please their woman: most of us do not actually enjoy penetration sex because most of us had rarely experienced a truly connected, wholesome penetration experience.

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